Weddings

Weddings are my favorite…

… Favorite thing to make fun of that is…

For a guy, a wedding is the final formality of the arrangements needed before he gets what he wants; he just wants the girl. For a girl …
…

… that reminds me, I have no idea what a wedding means to a girl… but from what I think I see… It’s the day after she plans a year with weeks of stressing out which leads up to the worst 24 hours of her life just for one moment where she romantically rides off into the sunset with a prince. (not the realprincecharming… that’s the opposite of what girls want to ride off with)

The one thing that gets me every time, is the fact that girls spend months to years planning to make a wedding special and unique, and it always ends up the same thing as the last wedding.

Yes so I came up with a list of things that seem funny to me at weddings…

1. Pastors giving sermons on how “one day he will be hard to get alone with”. If they haven’t had a fight yet… a sermon on their WEDDING day isn’t going to help them get over it. Who even listens to the pastor anyways? Everyone is just watching the bride and groom whisper at each other and make stupid faces at each other

2. Love! Why do they act like it’s the beginning of loving each other? If you don’t love each other already I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t be getting married. Let’s be realistic here, there is only one thing you have to wait until marriage to do.

3. The groom has to walk done the aisle 5-10 times but the bride only walks done the aisle once. Who wants to see the groom 10 times? Everyone just wants to see the bride!

4. The brides always wear white! Doesn’t white get old? It seems unfair, its total peer pressure for a girl to have to wear white. Honestly, what if the girl didn’t look good in white? Now, because everyone wears white, she has to go with her 2nd best.

According to our comparison, some girls look fatter in white.




But we all know why the girls plan the wedding. For one, they pay for it. But perhaps it's because if I (or another guy) planned a wedding it would look like this:




I'm actually working on planning my own wedding... It's going to be an all black wedding... the clothing that is. We'll go with a 2 minute sermon... we'll just skip to the i do... go for the kiss and run down the aisle. We'll stay for just enough time to eat a feast and then I'll be gone! Honeymoon=first priority.


I haven't told the woman yet so... we'll see how it goes. If anyone asks... this post was by one of the other two guys...